Another day, same crap

So, I have realized that the boys in my life are so complicating, and I think I have a major problem, because that makes me stay even longer. I deal with shit from this one boy I have been seeing, and I really like him, but he is so much trouble, I feel like I have to deal with stuff I never would before. I hate when people are flaky about plans, and he totally is one of those people, he will blow me off, unless there is nothing better going on, and there is my red flag, so why am I not going away? I think Ivan has given me such a complex, that I secretly and so afraid of getting hurt, so I stick around for the guys that treat me like shit, and I don't expect anything so this way I don't get hurt, but I am getting hurt by what he is doing. I feel so unwanted, and the thing is, I have a few other guys "after me", but that's not what I want, I don't want to surround myself with guys, I don't need their approval, I don't need them to like me, I just want him to like me! So, mark my words, from this moment on, I am done trying with him, if something happens, it happens, I am not rushing things, and I am not getting upset if I don't get my way. If he wants to hang out, or whatever, he will make the effort..I just hope he does...