You're Not Sorry

All this time I was wasting hoping you would come around
I’ve been giving out chances everytime and all you do is let me down
And its taking me this long but baby I figured you out
And you think it will be fine again but not this time around


You don’t have to call anymore
I won’t pick up the phone
This is the last straw
Don’t want to hurt anymore
And you can tell me that you’re sorry
But I won’t believe you baby like I did before
You’re not sorry no more, no more, no

Lookin’ so innocent
I might believe you if I didn’t know
Could’a loved you all my life
If you hadn’t left me waiting in the cold
And you got your share of secrets
And I’m tired of being last to know
And now you’re asking me to listen
Cuz its worked each time before

But you don’t have to call anymore
I won’t pick up the phone
This is the last straw
Don’t want to hurt anymore
And you can tell me that you’re sorry
But I don’t believe you baby like I did before
You’re not sorry no no no noo
You’re not sorry no no no noo

You had me crawling for you honey
And it never would’ve gone away no
You use to shine so bright
But I watched our love it fade
So you don’t have to call anymore
I won’t pick up the phone
This is the last straw
There’s nothing left to beg for
And you can tell me that you’re sorry
But I won’t believe you baby like I did before

So I have been looking for the perfect song to describe everything, I think this song comes close. Well semi-close, because let's face it, Ivan could never be man enough to admit he was wrong and was sorry. That would NEVER happen. I fell for everything he said to me, all the lies, and I delt with all of the pain, and all of the fights, because I loved him so much. All of his secrets, people that were supposed to be my "friends" knew things, and couldn't tell me. He changed, he used to have so much love in him, and we never fought, and he changed, nothing would have ever been the same anyway. Too many things happened. I sometimes think back on our relationship, and I miss things, but I miss things that were fake, and nothing about our relationship was true, except my feelings for him. I wish I had that guy back, I wish some things could be different, I wish he didn't have such poisionous friends in his life that brainwashed him. I wish I had some of the stuff back I gave him, the stuffed animals and such. He probably threw them out. He had so many problems though, so many, and he couldn't get over the fact that I had been with my share of guys and made me feel bad about it, I felt like I had to apologize for who I was, and for the person I was, and I just always felt bad, well not anymore honey. I am living my life, and I won't apologize for who I am, or what I have done before. I am a grown up, if I want to sleep with someone, then that's between me and that person, it's not anyone else's business. Sure I am seeing some people right now, but I am almost 23, I can do whatever, and I won't feel bad about that. So screw your judgement, this is the first time I am living my life and not caring what anyone else thinks.